Desdemona's Bellydance Blog

I have something to update about!!

2010-03-20T07:42:00.000-07:00

My work schedule has just been crazy for the last few months between travel, overtime, weekends, and occasionally weird hours (showing up at 4:30 AM on a Saturday, for example). It's totally worth it even if it means falling asleep by 7:00 on a Friday night (this just happened).

In the midst of some overtime weeks, I threw my back out, which was awesome. I was walking around with heating pads and medicated pads over the area. Fun times. It took about a month to heal since I couldn't really rest during that time... But at least it did in time for me to make it to the third Aubre's technique tune-up series.

I haven't been attending weekly classes due to my schedule and the practicality of driving to LA on a weeknight. Thankfully, Aubre started a series of mini-intensives back in January. I've made it out for glutes and upper body work (missing the obliques while my back was out). I love studying with Aubre. She totally kicks my butt and always gives me something to really think about. A lot of workshops wind up being about learning tricks and combos. My experience studying with Aubre is that I get new ideas for general technique. She has a vast amount of knowledge and is an amazing and very supportive teacher. She has two more of the intensives at the Center of Worldance in Alhambra coming up (April 2 and May 2). I highly recommend them. I was thankfully able to schedule a break in my upcoming work travel so I can get to the one on April 2nd.

I've actually done a lot of updating on my website. My shiny new computer with its vastly superior processing power (it replaced a 2005 laptop that I bought to carry everywhere for grad school and was thus small, lightweight, and not very high-powered) was able to convert some pictures I'd gotten from an August show and cut video. So, that's up there.

Of course, watching videos of myself made me cringe anew and reflect on how much work I have to put in to my dancing. Especially now, since my dance practice schedule has definitely suffered. I'm finally starting to get into a "wake up at 4-4:30 for yoga and dance practice" zone but I'm leery of something else coming up to break the cycle.

It seemed like time to update

2009-11-03T16:57:00.000-08:00

I'm so rarely online anymore. I've been kept busy at work, putting in some extra hours and traveling, and have a wonderful boyfriend and adorable kittens at home that need attention. I'm still working out consistently fitting dancing into my schedule. Going "down below" and performing has been pretty much out. But I'm happy, so that's ultimately what matters.

I did get to spend a weekend with Aubre and Deb Rubin at their "Bellydance Body Intensive." It was *amazing* and I got so many new tools to work with in terms of dancing and just my overall body. I really hope they do another intensive together.

I'll also be out at the Oasis for Princess Farhana and Sabrina Fox's days Nov 7 and Dec 5. After that, I'll probably drop off the face of the dancing world for the most part until after I finish my last graduate class. There should be a performance at Moun of Tunis somewhere in there though, so I won't be totally out of it.

I'm hoping to spend some time at home working on my technique and style so I at least make good use of the time and come back refreshed and with something new. I feel really inspired by Aubre and Deb but that'll take time to incorporate it into my dancing. I also downloaded some new music from Collide (plus ordered their new CD!) and Solace (new album on CDBaby!), so I'm sure there'll be some creative juices flowing. Although I do need a new iPod to put them on... mine disappeared somewhere at LAX. Not to worry, since my insurance company covered a replacement, yay!

I think it's "curl up and read a book with a kitty" time now.

Dancing in the Real World

2009-08-14T23:10:00.000-07:00

For those not in the loop who happen on here, Desdemona has a day job. Desdemona's new day job is the best job she could possibly ask for. Some dancers talk about being the little three-year-old cuties pirouetting around and wanting to be dancers when they grew up. Well, I wanted to do what I do now Monday-Friday.

The reality of my work is that I'm gone at least eleven hours out of the day between my commute and my work day. Very soon, I'll start pulling extra hours as necessary, meaning evenings and weekends. I really want to do well in my career and I have definite goals for myself there. So... there has to be a new balance.

First thing people around me may have noticed: I've dropped off the face of the planet. I'm rarely online, I have a multi-day turn-around to most e-mail (although I do try and get to the most important stuff on the same day), and I never go anywhere. That part shouldn't be shocking. I'm up 5-5:30 AM to get ready for work and home around 5:30. I then have a few hours before I have to start thinking about going to bed to start it over. While I love my friends, I love my boyfriend more. And sustaining my body through consumption of delectable items.

No offense.

I'm working on balancing dance into all of it. I can't really go to classes anymore since they're pretty much all mid-week and, considering how far away I live, it's pretty much impossible to make anything on a work night. Practice is trying, too. I'm used to getting up and having an hour practice for work. I'm trying to work out getting up before 4:30 and being alert enough to do some dancing but I've only succeeded a couple times thus far.

So, I consider other options. Thankfully, there are still workshops offered on weekends (yay for Politti and the Oasis for my monthly excursion to Highland!), although I'm planning on moving next month and have to pay double rent for a few weeks so that's not a guaranteed thing right now. There are also private lessons. I've gotten more and more into private instruction. I look for people who will tear my dancing apart and give me a very focused idea on what I can do better. I'm something of a criticism glutton, honestly. It's just how I motivate.

Performing is going to have to take a step back, too. I really want to focus on improving my technique and polish and performing sometimes gets in the way of that. I'm not really happy with my dancing right now, so that means it's time for a lot of hard work. It'll be good for me though and I'm sure I'll still be getting out to perform once a month or so.

I miss my friends and I miss dance classes with the camaraderie there. It's been hard feeling so isolated but I do know I'm where I really want to be. I'll still be around.

Wow, it is *so* past my bedtime...

Fourth of July at the Pirate Faire!!

2009-07-08T10:31:00.000-07:00

This is the post where I get to share Performing Gone Wrong, which is kind of fun in its own way. It's really a learning experience for me. In this case, I hadn't done much performing outdoors and I'm still REALLY inexperienced with veilwork, so it's important for me to learn what went on in this case. I'd also never really experienced sword-work outside in the wind. For some reason, it just didn't occur to me that my sword, which is kind of heavy, would also be subject to wind. Boy, did I learn!!!

I was asked by the lovely Laura of 2 Hip Tribal to perform at the first ever Brown's Canyon Pirate Faire in Chatsworth over Independence Day weekend. I was given fifteen minutes to perform and wound up with a sixteen minute set (or maybe a little more... I did cut my music slightly). I debated on what to dance to and even if I'd pick three different sets of music. Ultimately, I went with Lincolnshire Posy by Percy Grainger.

In the 1930s, Grainger went forth to the English countryside with cylinders and recorded locals singing traditional folk songs. He then arranged the songs for wind ensemble, trying to capture the spirit of each singer. I performed this music when I was in the University of Toledo's wind ensemble, playing clarinet. I really enjoyed dancing to very Western classical music. It was kind of a nice bridge between my own heritage (check the skin tone, I am SO English/Irish/German in ancestry - well, and Italian) and the dance form I love.

The great thing about the music was the six movements. Faire crowds kind of have ADD (well, most crowds do, honestly...), so I knew it'd be hard to maintain anyone's interest in me for fifteen minutes. Thus, I broke out every prop I own (minus zills, they really didn't work with the music). I danced with sword, double veil, single veil, sai, and (doing something I think is really cool) sai with a sword on my head.

I think I mentioned funny outtakes? Flipping sai with sword was NOT easy to learn. When I started, I would sometimes do things like hit the sword with my arm while flipping the sai out, get hit in the head by my hilt (which is jarring, I assure you), have to toss a sai to the other hand, and catch the sword by the blade. One time, I failed and my sword wound up on Donavon's concrete floor (yay boyfriend to reshape and sharpen the tip!). In other words, kind of like any other time I try to do something crazy and new with sword but this time my hands were full.

The first performance went well (I only have 8-9 minutes of that video, which covers three movements and some of the fourth). The second? The wind had picked up. It was a *really* low key event and most of my audience were people who had seen my performance earlier and/or were performing themselves. Otherwise, I would not have continued trying to dance with veil long after I'd concluded it was a bad idea.

It wasn't just the veil. I was standing with my sword on my head to get my "groove" for dancing and I had to keep an arm in front of the blade to keep the sword from twisting on my head. I wasn't even sure I'd be able to do the sword+sai trick when I was performing and was prepared to cut it (I went for it anyway because I'm like that, I just had to do some adjusting as I went). The veilwork... I mostly just need more experience. I was fighting the wind most of the time instead of working with it. In normal performing, I'd have dropped the veils and just danced but I figured I could keep trying and learn something from it.

Oh yeah, that was a 3.5 yard veil, too. And trust me, half a yard makes a difference. I did go out and get heavier fabric since I knew silk would be even more challenging in wind.

At the end, I wound up busting out what I call the "frell it Turkish drop" (I may be editing my word choice a little). It was unrehearsed, unprepared, unpracticed (actually, I'd wanted to end with a Turkish drop originally but I hadn't been practicing them, since they can be rather hard on the joints and cut it so I could focus on the sixteen minutes of dancing). In fact, the only other drops I'd done in performance were my mini-drops with a sword on my head (you can't really get as low, so it's not the same). But I was just tired from fighting the wind, hot, and I'd been going for sixteen minutes. So, I tossed the veil and drop. DONE. It looked pretty good and I didn't feel any pain from it, so yay for me.

Story done, here are the videos! I'm pretty sure there will be video from Sunday later and I'll make another post then.

First performance: includes sword and double veil

Second performance: includes sword and double veil

Second performance: includes sai, sword, and single veil

Nike could be the official sponsor of my belly dancing...

2009-06-29T11:30:00.001-07:00

And hey, if they wanted to pay me ridiculous royalties to dance in special Nike-gear bellydance shoes, I'd be down for that.

Warning, this is so ramble-y and long! I blame multi-tasking and my lack of interest in editing my writing down to perfect, article-like form.

I've been thinking a lot about my dancing lately (my self-confidence has been wavering a bit lately). I suppose it's normal and happens to everyone, so I'm honestly not that bent out of shape about it. Mostly, I just haven't been practicing like I usually do. There's no one reason, it's just an endless cycle of feeling dissatisfied with myself, so I can't muster up the inclination to practice, and then I'm dissatisfied with myself for being lazy.

I finally had to write the bio for my webpage and did research on it by reading what other people had written. Most common opening? "Bob is a life-long dancer." Well, I'm not. I think my parents had me in some kind of dance/theater-type thing when I was a toddler (I have photographic evidence but I'm frightened to ask about it further... Looking at the face paint, there could be a relation to my dislike of clowns...). But I didn't take ballet. Or jazz. Or tap. Or etc. etc. etc. I wasn't even allowed to be a cheerleader, so I don't even have *that* background. Ask for a demo of how I danced pre-bellydance sometime. I'll try to duplicate it.

So, unlike all these other amazing dancers, I started dancing in my mid-twenties. I didn't think I'd be any good at it. As some totally impossible goal, I wanted to be able to dance like Ariellah but, mainly, I wanted to make friends outside of work and maybe have female friends again (I had some when I was in my engineering fraternity in college and it's nice having lady friends with similar interests - I love being one of the guys, but they sometimes come with super-jealous SO's and then I'm out a friend). I didn't find out about the dance troupes in my area until after I moved to California though. Oops.

I think the thing that saved me was that I *didn't* worry about being good at it. I just did it. It was a way to get some extra exercise (I was into running and lifting but dancing was a new way to work on flexibility and balance that didn't bother my wrists like yoga did (I started yoga off DVDs, too, and it was a while before I learned how to distribute my weight correctly). It was a few months before I got into classes at all and, when I did, I still wasn't really looking to be good at dancing.

Then, I learned about *workshops* and I got to take one with Ariellah. I really couldn't keep up and it was totally above my level but that workshop was the turning point for me. I went from being convinced I'd never be any good at it to thinking, "Wow. I can actually study with Ariellah. If I can learn *from her*, I might one day be *good* at this." Ariellah's one of those great, down-to-earth dancers who will talk about how it just takes practice and then she'll tell stories about when her technique wasn't as flawless as it is now. That had a pretty big impression on me.

So, I practiced more, I took workshops, I started driving a hundred miles to OC for classes. My technique started getting better and I really started to believe in myself.

I was on a high from taking all the workshops at Gothla (including Ariellah and Romka), when I was asked to perform at a club I regularly attended (it's where I met my darling boyfriend, too). Was I ready? Probably not. I trusted the opinion of the promoter/DJ of the event. If she thought I was worth hiring to perform, there must be something to it, right? So, I just did it (see what I did there? I finally got to Nike). I whipped up a choreo for a sword performance. Why sword? 1) I'd have a weapon if people hated it and 2) my sword is my partner when I dance, so I didn't feel so alone out there... Of course, I forgot my choreo a couple of times, and I had to adapt it on the spot since my audience was on four sides and I'd choreographed to my mirrors. I got through it though. And the first time is DEFINITELY the hardest.

Actually, my first time was a performance with a class I'd joined *that day* doing a choreo I'd learned in a city-run course. I tend to not count it though.

I think the secret to getting where I am as fast as I have (and I have to CONSTANTLY remind myself how short a time I've been dancing, especially now, when I get frustrated with myself) is that I don't really hesitate. I just do it. I decided I wanted to learn veil-work. I approached someone about private lessons but she would never get back to me about times/dates, so I learned from DVDs.

That's right, my single and double veil work? I've never had a minute of real instruction. It's *ALL* DVD. I can't even practice it that much. I pretty much have to rent a studio to have any kind of practice. So, you know, it's not as good as I'd hope.

Despite this, I started performing with veil. If I start second-guessing myself, I could easily see myself slipping into a pattern of never doing anything. I didn't develop any performing skill by practicing over and over at home (I did develop belly dancing skill by practicing over and over at home, performing is a different story). I did it by performing for an audience. A lot. I could watch video and see how my technique suffers in front of an audience, how I would get "thinking" face, or how my first improvisational performances were *really* repetitive, etc. It gave me things to work on in my practice (I get that from seeing my veil performances, too, choosing to perform with it has given my practice focus).

Sidenote: funny thing about double veil? Repetitive is good... People seem to like it when you spin for a really long time. I find this kind of funny. All that time practicing so I *wouldn't* be repetitive and then I learn double veil and just SPIN. Or choo-choo shimmy my veil out of my butt-tuck, as happened when I was practicing Saturday.

I learned from performing and I think I did it faster than I ever would have if I kept my dancing to classes and practice. I also took other opportunities to learn. I learned improvisation from going to DJ Xian's clubs and dancing to whatever she played. In my opinion, the BEST way to learn improvisation is to have no clue what's coming next. Then, you start thinking in terms of ebb and flow of music and how to feel an upcoming moment, so you can match it.

And you can't worry about missing it either! Kind of like how you can't worry about dropping your sword or getting your veil tangled up. Belly dancing isn't *easy* and it takes work. Screwing up comes with the territory. I've done it so many times, I've lost count (my first improvisational sword performance? My sword slipped off the back of my head and I had to catch it - I was performing at a wedding, too). Not to mention the near accidents I've had! I can watch videos of me dancing and talk about that time I almost tripped and fell over (total klutz, remember?), or my sword started slipping and I had to recover it, or I made myself really, really dizzy and was spotting to a blur so I could still have the effect of spotting (yesterday? That totally happened. Most of my spotting was fake). I bet if someone just watched it (watched, not scrutinized), they couldn't find those moments. I didn't order the DVD but there was a moment early on in my Punk Raqs performance where I tore off a callus. I was in so much pain, I couldn't put my shoes on after performing and I've been limping around the apartment. I bet the moment it happened couldn't be found. I doubt anyone could even tell I was in pain (and I was doing crossover and paddle turns with that tender spot rubbing against the carpet). Things happen and you can't spend your whole life freaking out over possibilities.

Just do it.

My website is live!!

2009-06-26T15:17:00.000-07:00

I finished development of my website (at least for now, I'm sure I'll keep working on it over time). Check it out and pass along any comments, feedback, problem reporting, etc.

I'm now working on my first site commission. Catch me now, while I'm cheap and think this is fun!!

On music

2009-06-20T11:28:00.001-07:00

This was going to be a facebook/twitter update (I do have a twitter and facebook) but it got too long in my head, so it's blog time!

I was a musician long before I was a dancer (so at least my "dancing" was in rhythm - air quotes are a necessity, I wouldn't call what I used to do dancing), so it's a really big part of my life. It not only serves as a reminder of people, places, events, etc. It's tied in to my mood and is always my first point of inspiration in pretty much everything I do. I'm one of those people who is quite happy jacked into an iPod 24/7. In fact, when I was in grad school (and for a bit at the end of undergrad), I would thread earbuds down the back of my shirt and attach my player to my belt as part of my "getting dressed" routine. If I'm not listening to it, it's in my head... I'm pretty much always walking to some kind of beat.

Anyway, that's not where I was going with this. Now that I've gotten into the bellydance world, I find songs reminding me of performances (this post brought to you by me listening to my "bellydance performances" playlist). Some songs, I associate with a particular dancer and performance so strongly, I would never consider using that song for myself. Pretty much anything Ariellah uses in a performance is off-limits to me. I've danced to those songs at clubs and I can't listen to it without thinking of her performance. There are other songs out there that I think of as, "Oh, that She'enedra song or Shoop's song" or whatever.

Then, there are the songs I consider permanently sullied by a less than stellar performance. It's almost to the point where I can't listen to some songs because it reminds me of a particular performance that I was... less than impressed by. The worst is if someone uses a song that I associate in a very positive way with one dancer and then... well... smears dirt all over it, to be metaphorical. Thankfully, for this, there are DVDs and youtube videos that work well as a form of eye bleach. But less abrasive (and yes, I really do have, "Quick! Go to a new video!!" occasions).

I just find that interesting. I wasn't a dancer AT ALL until... about two years ago, I suppose? Anyway, it's strange to me now how I associate music with dancers and dancing. I will say that part of what drove me to dance was the choreography I saw in my head while listening to some songs. I definitely have a longer list of songs I've been inspired to dance to than songs I have used. It's part of why almost every performance I do is completely different. I have to much music to reuse anything! :)

While I'm kind of on the subject, I'm really excited about Pirate Faire in July. I'm really thrilled about my music choice, which I got from when I was a clarinetist in the University of Toledo wind ensemble. The last segment of music is one of my favorite tunes. If you ever catch me dancing to nothing, it is entirely possible that song is in my head. It's an extremely danceable tune and also so very happy. To me, dancing should always be something that makes you happy.

Enough rambling... I'm actually busy today and should get back to that.

Weekend with Ariellah = Amazing, Awesome, Inspirational

2009-06-16T10:04:00.000-07:00

I love Ariellah! She's such an amazing performer, great teacher, and sweet person. I am always thrilled to have the opportunity to learn from her and watch her perform. This last weekend, I took two three-hour workshops with her and danced in her showcase. Really amazing times. I always walk away feeling so inspired and challenged. She gives me good things to work on in my own practice.

I've been in a bit of a bad spot in my personal life, so my dance practice had been suffering. So, getting some extra inspiration and drive is definitely a good thing. I felt better after the weekend. I'd missed dancing, too. I hadn't been doing much of it in a month. Having a weekend full of it was a good reminder of what dance means to me.

I did a little dance with my veil. I'm still very new to veil, especially with it being such a huge challenge to dance with it in my tiny apartment. I debated performing with it since I didn't really feel ready but decided to go for it and learn some important lessons. :)

I had to throw a little Romka tribute into the beginning. I was very sad to hear that Tribal Fest and DC Tribal were the last planned events for Romka. I'm excited about Mavi and Belladonna pursuing solo work and I know they'll collaborate again but Romka has been a huge inspiration to me and it's sad to see it go. It was also fun for me to be very silly. It was a line up of gothic bellydancing with a lot of intensity, so I got to be more of the goofball. Whee!

Lots of gigs coming up now, although I'm waiting on confirmation on some. I'm dancing on July 4th at the Pirate Faire in Chatsworth (12:15-12:30 and 5:30-5:45, I believe). I may be dancing June 27th down in Highland with a friend's band. Plus Bellydance Kaleidoscope on July 19th in Highland. Very fun times. :)

Gathering the tribe for DJ Amar

2009-05-29T20:48:00.000-07:00

So, I spent the holiday weekend at my parents' house in Ohio. My sister was in town with her husband and two kids, the youngest (2 mos), I hadn't met yet. It seemed a good thing. But commentary of that type doesn't really go here, so I'll just say it was a good visit.

Anyway, I had the privilege of being a part of Tabu's Tribal Nights showcase in Las Vegas before my flight. It was my debut double veil performance and a lot of fun. It was a pretty great showcase and I love the Tabu ladies. :)

After I got to the airport, I wound up in an e-mail by phone conversation with Amar for one reason or other, I don't even know. At some point, he said he'd gotten a plane ticket to LA for the next weekend and wanted to know what was happening. I didn't know much but knew that Amar visiting is *definitely* a reason to have something! So, a huge facebook thread (I should say I did almost everything through my phone) later, and we had a show at Donavon's with AMAZING local talent. It's moments like that where I just feel so unworthy. I felt it at the Cosmik Casbah at TF and I felt it in this. But I trust Amar and if he wants me in his line-up, he's way more experienced than me!

It was an amazing show. We wound up with SuperKate, myself, Karma, Michaella, She'enedra, Shoop and Calamity, and Aubre to close it out. Absolutely awesome!! It's the kind of show that just doesn't come around every week and such an honor to be part of the line-up and work with everyone that night.

SuperKate gave me some ideas on how to get my freaking right hand to move. I think I felt off since I hadn't been dancing since TF, really (I'm going through some tough times right now that I need to just get over now). Plus, I was practicing my "cabaret face" as I had a "What is my music doing?!" expression a few times. It was all kinds of awesome though and I had a great time!

Tribal Fest!

2009-05-20T20:49:00.000-07:00

I'm finally getting to posting about Tribal Fest. It was a whirlwind weekend and I feel like I still haven't come down from it! I'm already packing for my next trip too... this one is just to Ohio to see my family. Although, I received a very generous and last-minute invitation to dance at TABU's Tribal Nights showcase in Las Vegas before my flight out. I'll be there to celebrate Nisha's birthday, which is cool.

So... wow. Tribal Fest weekend. My boyfriend and I drove up Thursday to San Francisco for some dinner at the pier and then to see Le Serpent Rouge. I absolutely adore the Indigo and this was my first time seeing them perform live. Such an amazing, innovative, inspired show! I really enjoyed the whole thing. All three women are so incredibly beautiful and talented, it's almost overwhelming to see them all together. It's also always entertaining! It's great seeing dancers who just love to dance and have fun. The live band was quite awesome as well! Great music and variety acts. It was very much like being taken back into the height of Vaudeville. Just a really great time.

Friday, I got up for some breakfast with Tonantzin from She'enedra and her boyfriend and then I basically went into the first stage of prepping for my performance. This involved running through all the tricks I'd planned in my performance, running the music and improvising in a larger space than what I have at home, getting made up, etc. We then headed to the festival for the first time for my workshop with Asharah. Partway through some very bizarre 3 PM traffic in a tiny town, I realized I'd left my music at the cottage (I'd switched bags so I could bring clothes for the pre-party). My boyfriend is such a champion. He took me to my workshop and then turned around to get my music for me. The workshop was interesting. A lot about bringing darker emotions to the stage as a release and putting it into your movements. I was somewhat distracted by a phone call partway through with a bit of happy news... It was more something for me to take home with me and maybe work on for a future performance. Although, to be honest, I really like just being a happy bellydancer. I tried doing the dark mistress of pain, black-soul-infused performances to be a gothic bellydancer and... it just doesn't work for me. I really see nothing wrong with just enjoying dancing and having no purpose on stage but to entertain and share a little joy. It's still good to learn something a little different.

After the workshop, it was time to start freaking out over my performance, which was a little more than two hours later. I was definitely in the green room getting 1) starstruck (OMG, Rachel Brice is getting ready in the corner RIGHT OVER THERE!!!!) and 2) being terrified of going on that stage. Tribal Fest is a BIG DEAL. I was also in the midst of a LOT of instructors and very well known performers, so it was a very large crowd. I went out to see Zafira Dance Company and the Mezmer Society as well as TABU (awesome, awesome, AWESOME performances!!!). The TABU ladies, by the way, were AWESOME to talk with when I was getting ready. I knew them from Mythical Creatures (and even saw them way back when they won Hips of Fury's troupe competition), so I was comfortable talking with them. It really helped my nerves. After TABU danced, I figured it was time to zone in to Raquy and the Cavemen and get my groove. That wound up leading to sitting outside for air and chatting with Jeremiah Soto (the man behind Solace). I'm really excited about the Vaudeville compilation coming out (mine's pre-ordered!) and what he has up his sleeve for next year. Jeremiah's really sweet.

Then, I performed. Holy crap, I was terrified!!! I was very grateful to Onca O'Leary for making a funny face at me while I was being announced. It cracked me up and help alleviate my nerves. My music piped up and I took my sweet time getting to where I wanted to be. Thanks to Tjarda of Uzume for teaching me a tango step! Both she and Mira described it as "testing out" the area before stepping. It helped. I never lost connection with the floor, so I had plenty of time to register that I was on the Tribal Fest stage and, by golly, I'd sure as hell better finish out that 4:49 piece of music. Besides, I had a weapon. The video, in all its glory:

I have over 500 views at this time. That's definitely a "o.O" moment for me!! I refuse to critique this performance of myself. At least not yet. I danced, for five minutes, at Tribal Fest, in front of a HUGE audience that included dancers like Mavi (one of my sword dancing IDOLS), Aubre, April Rose, TABU, Tonantzin, and so many more! I didn't drop my sword, I managed to do slow level changes without losing balance or movement integrity. Yeah, overall? I think I can walk away saying I did good. By the way? Best. Audience. Ever. The video shows people getting up but all I remember is all the zaghareeting. Holy crap. I've never felt so loved on a stage as I did at Tribal Fest. I kind of think all performances are downhill from here on out. And watch out for my performance next year! I've got something crazy up my sleeve now.

Anyway, I ran across the front of the stage to catch Marjhani (who was AWESOME - I was really hoarse and my tongue tired from cheering and zaghareeting so much all weekend) and then went back to get ready for the pre-party, eat a bit, and join my boyfriend to see the rest of Friday night. That included the amazing ROMKA', Rachel Brice, Princess Farhana, Asharah, and closed with the Suhaila Salimpour Dance Company. It was a really amazing show. I can't believe I was a part of it!

We got our roommate, and headed to the pre-party. After driving a bunch, we got a parking spot and made our way in pretty much in time to see Mirabelle, She'enedra, and Deb Rubin (although the last was tough to see since she was just on a mini-stage in front of the DJ with people dancing in front of her - I had to push my way in, dancing, to see her). Really fun!! I was definitely enjoying the spinning. I need to remember who the DJ was that was up there...

Saturday, I had the day off from Tribal Fest. So, Michael and I drove our roommate to her workshop and then headed to St. Helena for a picnic at the V. Sattui winery (excellent wine, only available at their winery) and then to wine tasting at Grgich Hills (we're going through some poverty, but if you're only going to taste at one winery, make it Grgich Hills). As reference? If you've heard of Bottleshock (a pretty good movie, especially if you feel like going "Yeah, go California wines!!), Mike Grgich is the man portrayed as the producer of the award-winning chardonnay from Chateau Montelena. I don't like chardonnay. I wish I could buy Grgich Hills's chardonnay by the case. It's that good.

Anyway, it was a nice day for us. We then got back to the cottage with Michael driving and me sleeping. We got inside and I pretty much just fell onto the bed and fell back asleep with him joining me a bit after. I woke up to make dinner (we pre-bought at Trader Joes - they have an Indian dinner in a box that isn't too bad...) and got ready to perform at the after-party.

Now, for some reason, I thought I'd be in a large group of dancers. NoooOOOOoooo. It was She'enedra and me improvising to Amar's electric vardo, Zafira Dance Company (I saw them TWICE! I LOVE them and want their DVD), Circus Tribal (again, SO MUCH LOVE. They were very sweet and very talented), Cherchez Le Femme (the gorgeous, breathtaking, awesome Sherri Wheatley - she is SO SWEET!!!), Samantha Riggs (she freaking rules! More on that later), and Queen Harish (drag queen from India extraordinaire!!). Holy crap!!! Awesome freaking show and I DANCED in it. OMG. I love Amar!!!! And Sooz, our fabulous MC! Queen Harish completely owned an awesome show. He was AMAZING. I can't believe he was giving ME tips on spinning with double veil. He wound up turning the whole place into a Bollywood musical. I went to get air and chat with people and came back and he had a group on and in front of the stage dancing together to the beats from Cheb I Sabbah. Awesome! I had so much fun!! Plus, I got new music from Amar, yay!!!

Sunday was a sad day, for it was the last day of the Fest. Also a happy day that started with an AWESOME (the word is used often but not overused in this case - the whole weekend really was AWESOME) workshop with Romka on theatrical presentation. I really love Mavi and Belladonna. I study with them whenever I can and recommend anyone else do the same. They're an absolute pleasure to be around and really wonderful to learn from. I then actually had some time to walk around the festival for the first time all weekend. So, I said hi to my friends, made some new ones (even got stopped to get complimented on my after-party performance), and went in to see more great performers. I stayed for as much of Amar's Electric Vardo as I could before I had to run for Sam Riggs's workshop. She took the group (made much smaller by so many people not making it to that last workshop) from going "WTF are you doing?!?!" to dancing Bollywood/Bhangra at the end. With a disco ball (we found the switch to turn it on, very exciting). It was a GREAT workshop. I wish to study with Sam Riggs as often as possible now!!

Then, it was time for the Indigo. My wonderful boyfriend came through again and saved me a front row seat. I can't believe how spoiled I was seeing them twice in one weekend! Plus Rachel's solo Friday night! Really awesome performance (like they do another kind) and then the festival was over. Michael and I drove a friend out to downtown San Francisco (feeling a little like mice in a labyrinth trying and failing to find the cheese... that city is so hard to navigate by car if you don't know it), and then he was the champion who drove us all the way home while I slept.

Woo. It's kind of exhausting just reliving it to recap it! Hee! I really haven't stopped since I got back either. There's been a lot of catching up on sleep and things at home as well as videoing an audition piece (with a recommendation from Amar to go on top of it - he really is SO AWESOME), plus an ATS jam session with friends. I also was working up a quick piece for Vegas that should be fun. Oooh! I should go burn my music and pack now! Yay!

Finding my voice...

2009-05-08T11:19:00.000-07:00

Last weekend, I performed at the Oasis as part of the Mira Mania weekend. Side note, Mira Betz is AMAZING. Her workshops were just awesome. I am definitely joining the Church of Mira Betz and studying with her whenever I can. Anyway, I was really nervous about this performance. Like, first performance ever kind of nervous.

I feel like I'm finally starting to develop my own voice in performing. That's not to say I can't see the influence of other dancers in this piece, but I think that will always be with me. There are definitely some Fat Chance moves in here, a little She'enedra, some Mardi Love, Steven Eggers, Ariellah, Zoe Jakes, Asharah, Kami Liddle, etc (I may have actually gotten them all just then...) but I still feel like it was more "me" than anything else. I did actually use a couple new combos I came up with for the troupe that went inactive before we could use them. I feel oddly proud of the combos. They're great for drilling and something kind of different, I think.

So, the first one I threw in is the one I call "LL Cool J" for Locks, Layers, and Cool Juxtapositions. That starts at 4:54 on the video. That one was FUN. My next trick is to drill it the other way. And the second one is the "24 Hour Fake-out" because it started with this roly-poly thing I was doing at the gym in between lifting sets and it turned into trying to throw a whole lot of fake-out moves into it. That's at 5:44.

Because I was SO NERVOUS about this performance and walking around like, "Did I do good? Did I do good? I didn't suck right? You don't hate me, right?", I'm making myself focus on the really good things. I liked my combos. I feel pretty good about my isolations when I wanted them. Especially at the beginning where I transitioned into a full side winder. Sixteen fast spot turns in a row! I drifted during the performance and tensed up in my upper body but I held my spot and came out of it shimmying, which was good. I decided the difference between practice and performance was that my spot at home was a bunch of bright flowers my boyfriend had given me. So, I was more relaxed and had a much more focused point rather than the blinds (a good suggestion from Politti) So, the next step is to try spotting to something more vague and just focusing on relaxing.

I finally remembered to do frakking level changes!! Almost every time I come out of performing, I think to myself, "Oh crap! I was going to do these slow level changes!" So, I'm happy I did it and they don't look too terrible. I feel like I need to practice some of this stuff in a sauna. When I'm up performing, it's usually a LOT hotter than when I'm dancing at home and my legs aren't as strong. So, I think I need start practicing in saunas. Or, at the least, outside in the Mojave Desert sun.

My music was great! I took six minutes out of Amar's Dark Dubs mix. It was nice having the three distinct pieces of music with smooth transitions. Better than what I do messing with Audacity, that's for sure.

Now, I'm just focused on my Tribal Fest piece and the audition that I need to finish off. Hopefully, I can get that recorded soon and sent off. After that, all I have is the Ariellah showcase in about a month. So, LOTS of time for drilling practice since performances aren't quite the time-consuming prospect they used to be. Yay, improvisational solos!! In honor of sharing a stage with so many fantastic gothic bellydancers, I'm dancing veil to Kelly Clarkson. Hee! :D

Check it out!

2009-04-24T16:24:00.000-07:00

I made a webpage!

OK. It's just an "under construction" page but I made my last webpage when I was in junior high and everyone was on Geocities with embedded MIDI files (I had these obnoxious "stained glass"/kaleidoscope backgrounds, too... Oi!)

I'm going to have a real web-designer working on my webpage at some point but I wanted to get something up since I had Lee of Weathervane Images make me business cards (that are absolutely gorgeous!).

I may continue to "play" a little as I see fit and have time. It was kind of fun creating a style-sheet and playing around with html a bit. It could be an entertaining diversion while Michaella makes the real deal. On the other hand, I'd rather not have a sub-par webpage out there, so maybe it'll just be some super-un-linked-to secret. :)

First, I suppose I should do some editing of my blog's look and information, so it isn't a bad thing to be linking to it.

Yay!!!

2009-04-21T10:25:00.000-07:00

I got some good news yesterday! Not only did I get a coveted Tribal Fest spot after submitting it "late" (early January instead of November), having my application very misplaced (absolutely zero hard feelings or upset over this - TF is a huge festival that I can't even imagine organizing with no errors) and then getting put onto the waiting list. I got a spot Friday night!!! I'll be dancing at 7:24. I can't believe my luck. I would have been happy with the first performance of Saturday morning.

So, I've started work on putting together the piece. I'd originally had a really cool idea using Girl Talk (which was actually the cause of my application misplacement) but I don't feel I'll be able to prepare it to to my original vision in the time I have with all of the other stuff I have happening. So, next year, perhaps?

I switched out my music and spent some time this morning working out some new things with my sword and further developing some other techniques I'd been working on last month. Craziness is that I'm performing the same day as Romka, who are my idols for sword dancing. I get a lot of positive comments on my sword dancing and how dynamic it can be. I tell them I come from the Romka school of sword dance:

They're absolutely AMAZING. I'm a huge fan. I had the privilege of taking a sword workshop with them at the first Gothla to learn part of that choreography and what I've learned from that workshop (plus a bad-ass bellydance workshop I took from them at TF8), watching their performances, and from Belladonna's DVD remain the primary influences of my sword dancing.

I don't care where I am in the line-up with regards to them, I just hope I can watch!!

I have a lot of work ahead of me. I'm putting together an audition of a completely DIFFERENT variety, complete with single and double veil work, which I'm still extremely new to utilizing (and can't even really practice at home due to space requirements). Plus a performance in a little over a week that I need to pick music and plan for... And now my debut performance at Tribal Fest!! Really exciting.

While I'm showing inspirations, I've been looking around for tribal veil pieces to inspire me. So, here's one from Kaeshi of Bellyqueen:

And one from my friend (that's right, MY friend, I'm that cool - she also made my often-complimented headdresses and chainmail necklace), Karma:

Desdemona's Building a Rocket Ship

2009-04-16T12:02:00.000-07:00

I figured it was time to join the Blogspot bandwagon since my livejournal is pretty locked down, facebook will no longer allow me to publish or share notes, and tribe is extremely flaky. So, here I can post about my bellydancing: what I'm working on, where I'm going, and what I'm thinking about.

So, to start... what I'm working on these days:

My new project is veil work. I've decided I really want to be a well-rounded dancer. I also want to be a *good* bellydancer who doesn't use props to try and cover up my crappy dancing. So, I've been focusing on a bunch of things between work with props and straight dancing.

Bellydance sans props... I cranked out a couple new combos I'll be showing to my troupe and using on my own. One of them was just this weird slinky thing I started doing when I was resting between weight-lifting sets. The other is part of my current effort to break out of my shell a bit and try something new. I've been trying to throw in some more attitude and emotion into my dancing. I'm going to be starting some hot pot classes with April Rose soon, which should put a bit more energy and badassery (throwback to Romka's TF8 workshop!!!) into my dancing. I had another private session with Ariellah as well. I'm in the polishing up stage of my dancing and Ariellah's been amazing at giving me very fine-tuned critiques and suggestions of things to practice. And then she gives me these lovely compliments and I do a happy dance of joy.

Veil work has gone surprisingly well. I really want to see myself on video though to make sure I'm maintaining good form, posture, and grace (I'm so naturally clumsy that making sure I look graceful is no easy task!!) but in general, I've been taking to the basic moves pretty easily. I ordered a beautiful silk veil, which should help with the single veil movements. I was just using one of my semi-circular double veils that my boyfriend made for me and it was just too heavy to really get the single veil movements looking the way they should.

Double veil has even gone considerably easier than expected! I spent about fifteen-twenty minutes today basically spinning and worked out separating my veils, getting them back together, and getting myself between them. All with fast spinning. Whee!!! I'd been having a hard time practicing at home due to the tight space I'm in... then I remembered I work at a job-site with a huge gym and a rarely-used aerobics room with mirrors. So, I've gone there a couple times after normal business hours (to avoid unwanted attention) and had the place to myself to just spin and spin and spin. I was pretty proud of how my spirals and barrel turns were looking by the end! I'm hopefully going to get some time set up soon to have a friend and amazingly inspirational/beautiful/talented dancer give me some instruction and feedback. I think I'm going to do some filming of myself and upload it for critique, too.

Doing all the veilwork has given me more sword inspiration, so I think I'll be unleashing some more crazy sword stuff soon... I'm trying not to overuse my sword in performance. I don't want it to be all people recognize me with. Sai work may also go a bit on hold for me. It's a lot of fun but I think just something I should throw out occasionally.

I am starting to prep more emotional performances. It's great when I just get to be happy and joyful to dance but I want some more range than that. So... it should be fun! My performing schedule is slowing for the next few months (well... so far - this may change), so lots of time to practice, perfect, and experiment. :)

I am definitely trying to do something different in my dancing. I took some of the new ideas I'd gotten from Amy Sigil, Heather Shoopman, Na'la and Hilary of Shakra, Asharah, and Callisto to put together a performance earlier this month at the Oasis.